very brave indeed

i did sumtin very brave today.

well.. for those who have been reading my blog for quite sumtime.. i think in one of the posts i talked about how love does not only happen once. well here's a chapter two or some sort.


well.. noeing that love dun only happen once, the next time it happens.. it will inflict a bit more pain. mainly bcos then.. u have an old love as the past. thus, having an old love might affect ur current love. well not that it will make the person love u less or upset u had a past coz if that happens then mebbe that person just doesnt love u at all.. but i think the other will feel the pain when she/he reads or hears about ur past, especially when it's so vivid that it's as if he/she were there to see those exchanges happening. no.. if u love someone so much u wudnt think of whether or not he loves u now.. coz u shud noe that..

it's just that u wud think of how it wud be better if u were there earlier before the ex. so that u cud save ur loved one the pain of having to go thru that. then.. u wud also wonder why it took so long for him to realise that it wasnt working. 2 yrs? and then it's worst when u were actually there at about 1.5 yrs to observe the breakdown but it was not the end.. and then u realise that he had been goin thru that for way longer than u noe.. then u think of whether wat u have now is different.. and that he feels it's different.. or whether he is the most happiest. or THIS is it.. or whether... i dunno just so many things.

then again.. sometimes u cant help but to picture ur love with others.. and it just hurts so much. coz u know he wasnt really happy coz he is soooo happy now. then u think of how unfair it is for him to go thru that.. and why is it u didnt meet him when u were 5 instead? but mebbe if things happened differently then things mite not be as wonderful as it is now.. so we shan't think abt wat ifs.. and dun regret.. just recognise.. and have faith in ur love now. love with the fullness of ur heart..

then u just wanna hear that indeed u are different from every other.. and that this feeling he has is different from every other.. and that when he reads those again he thinks that it wasnt love.. and THIS is love. and just everything to tell u that THIS is right for him and just how much he loves u. but then when u have read or heard those things.. u wud want something more than wat he had given in the past to the others coz that cudnt be THE love for him.. and if THIS is THE love.. then there shud be more..



well actually.. i was reading old entries.. cried but i went on.. its just sumtin i had to do.



i noe u love me more than ever. i do too.. =) dun worry im ok. i noe wat u feel or felt.. we both wish all those things didnt happen and i think that's good enuff to noe.. although it cudnt happen..

i noe we will have more sweet, romantic, wonderful times..

i love u sayang.